Finding Peace
             By Tomy

 Bonnie stepped out into the moonlight.  Michael had left the friendly
get-together inside about half an hour ago. Kitt had glanced over briefly as
his partner stepped out, but made no move to join him.
 Twenty minutes later, his silhouette still on the deck stairs, she slipped
out the patio doors to join him.
 Michael heard Bonnie approach, moving over slightly as she sat on the deck
beside him, her feet tucked under the stair below.  He was holding his drink
between his knees, swirling the liquid in the can slowly. He needed to talk
about this, but he had no idea how to begin. Looking towards the woman who
had been one of his closest friends, had even shared his bed for a time.
 "Bon," he began in a low voice. "Have you ever thought about having kids?"
 Facing him straight on, his question taking her completely by surprise, she
answered honestly. "Yes, when we were together."
 He smiled softly at her, "I did too." He took a deep breath, choosing his
words.  Bonnie waited, knowing there was more to this. Letting his head fall
to stare at the can in his hands. "What would you do if you found out you
did have a child?  One you had no idea existed?"
 Bonnie's eyes grew wide in the dim light. Confusion written all over her
features.  He refused to lift his head, barely moving at all. "I...
Michael, where did this come from?"
 The tumbling emotions that had been effecting him for a few hours seemed to
swamp him again.  It was six months to the day that he had discovered the
truth.  Kitt had been supportive, understanding, but once a month it hit him
for an evening.  Sometimes he spoke of it, sometimes he just went for a
drive.  Today he needed something more, a new insight.  Bonnie was the
closest to him, other than Kitt, and he felt he needed a female opinion.
Closing his eyes, her image clear in his head. "Rhian."
 He had spoken her name so quietly, Bonnie took a moment to be sure of what
she heard. "How?"
 Michael snorted, shaking his head. "I had put the incident so far behind
me.  To know now that she had kidnapped Devon only to get to me.  That Rhian
was born without me knowing I had even been with Adrienne."
 Bonnie shifted, placing her hand on Michael's arm, as things began to make
sense.  Devon's kidnapping and subsequent return unharmed while Michael was
missing for a day or so, connecting to the attacks on Kitt recently. "My
God." Was all she could manage for a moment.  "She's your daughter?  Are you
sure?"
 Michael nodded, head hanging, finding no comfort from her touch. "We
compared samples, I had to know for sure.  Kitt had to know."
 That Bonnie could understand. Taking a deep breath, shoving her jealously
aside, she moved to the step below him, wanting to see him.  Lines of stress
and pain covered his face.  Something she was not used to seeing from him.
"How are you two?"
 Michael's lips twitched. "It almost tore us apart.  God, we've never fought
like that before."  His empty hand ran rubbed his forehead. "I wanted
to...for her to..." Jesus, he couldn't even say it anymore.
 Taking his hand, threading her fingers through his, then slouching down to
search for his eyes. "I don't blame you.  I would too."
   He smiled slightly at her words, relaxing.  "I can't get her out of my
head.  I keep thinking that I could have done things differently, that I
could have raised my daughter."
 Hearing him say it, the jealousy rose inside her again.  She would have
given anything to have had his child.  Adrienne had taken that joy from him,
and turned it into something deplorable.
 "There was nothing you could have done. Even if you had remembered, do you
think you could have found her?"
 "When she and Garthe captured us, I could have told her I knew.  She wanted
to be with me then, I could have gotten to her, to Rhian."
 "You really believe it would have been that easy?  If she wanted you to
know, she'd have flaunted your daughter in front of your eyes."
 Michael's head lifted, eyes filled with raging emotions. Bonnie was right.
He began to realize.  Rhian was born for one reason, to do what she did.
"Jesus, what a horrible existence for a child." Placing the empty can on the
stairs, he stepped around Bonnie's crouched form before walking away from
the house.  Needing a bit more privacy.
 Bonnie followed, stopping in front of him as he slid onto the hood of the
Trans Am. "You have to let this go."
 "I know, I just don't see how."
 "She tried to kill Kitt. Twice.  Then cut him up just to spite you."
 "I know Bon." The pain in his voice, the expression on his face, this was
not the Michael she knew and loved.  This was a defeated man.  Somehow, she
had to help him, change his view.
 "You've gone most of your life childless, why can't you go back to that?"
There was a cold edge to her voice.  One she didn't like hearing, but one
she hoped would help to get through to him.
 "When we spoke, when I told her I knew..." He shook his head.  "I know she
was lying, but for a moment it was so nice, like I had always thought it
would be like if I'd had a daughter."
 "But it wasn't real."
 "I'm not sure what 'real' is anymore, Bon."
 Sliding her hands to his neck, tipping his face up to look at her, holding
him there firmly, "Kitt's real, I'm real.  This is your life, not her."
 "It's easy to say. It makes sense to hear it.  I know I'm hurting Kitt and
I can't stop myself.  I try to block it, to get away when I feel it coming."
 "You're running Michael, and that's not you.  You have to face this first."
 He just looked at her. Thinking back over his own actions, wondering how
the hell he'd let himself act like that.
 Smiling at his new expression, she stepped closer, wrapping her arms around
his head, drawing him to her chest.
 He hadn't expected it, the warm embrace as he let his cheek rest against
her breasts, his arms slipping around her waist.
 "Why didn't you say something sooner?" Her one hand gently caressing his
hair.
 "I don't know."
 "More hiding?"
 Michael snorted. "Probably."
 "Is this a private moment?" Kitt's soft voice drifted from behind Bonnie.
 "Not from you it's not." Bonnie twisted, extending her hand behind her,
taking Kitt's, drawing him into the embrace. Michael's right arm moved from
Bonnie's waist to Kitt's, meeting his other behind them.  His eyes closed,
he felt Kitt move in, touch him, then close the hug between the three of
them.  Michael let his block drop, Kitt closed the distance, the two
presences twinning.  Opening his eyes, he caught Kitt's gaze from where
Bonnie held his head to her shoulder. Amazement greeted him.
 Shaking his head as he relaxed against her, "well, Mom, whatever you've
said to him, it seems to have finally gotten through that thick skull."
Michael chuckled against her.
 "That's what mothers are for." There was a hint of a smile in her words.
 "And to think I was becoming jealous."
 "Never, Kitt." The tone and strength of Michael's voice was more than
enough for both Bonnie and Kitt.
 "I made an observation." She told Kitt tenderly. "One I don't think either
of you saw."
 "What might that be?" Kitt's voice had also taken on a serene softness.
 "That he was running from this.  Hiding from his own feelings, and,"
tipping her head against the blond one, "possibly yours as well."
 She felt his head shift against her shoulder, and Michael's smile.  "I hit
something didn't I?" Both men nodded, causing her to smile. "See, you should
talk to me more often."
 "What do you think, Beauty?"
 "I think she's right." Bonnie snuggled into both heads, her hands running
through their hair.  So different, yet so alike.  A question circled in her
brain, the one part of their lives she would never be party to.
 "What's transferring across the link?" It was a quiet question, worried
that she was invading their privacy. She was very happy to hear them both
speak.
 "Contentment."