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by elvichar
“Peter - you know you’re going to have to find a place of your
own soon lad. You can’t keep moping around here, cluttering the place
up.”
Peter Pascoe said nothing. He didn’t feel like going through the
business of finding somewhere to live. Ellie’s leaving had knocked him
for six. It had not been completely unexpected, but when he failed to
get her to come back all the hope he’d had for a happy family life had
faded. Now he couldn’t help thinking she was a bitch. He didn’t want
to, the new-man side of him kept insisting he should look at it from
her point of view but he just couldn’t.
It wasn’t even so much that she’d gone - more that she’d taken their
daughter with her. That was unforgivable in his eyes.
He felt comfortable here. It felt safe, like a cocoon. He knew Andy
would keep on telling him he should move out, he knew too that he would
agree and do nothing about it. Anyway he couldn’t face living alone at
the moment. He had a horrible feeling he might do something stupid.
*************
Andy Dalziel was reaching the end of his tether with Pascoe. The lad
seemed to have lost all his old enthusiasm.
He was trying desperately to help, but everything seemed to make things
worse. After Dalziel had visited Ellie, begging for her to give Peter
another chance, he only compounded the situation. Not that he hadn’t
known it was hopeless.
Ellie seemed to have got some ridiculous notion into her head that
Peter’s devotion to work had something to do with Dalziel. When he’d
visited she had an air of bitter surrender - the wronged woman being
noble. A sort of resignation that her husband was inevitably going to
choose work, and Dalziel, over her.
She had made him realise that her return would have very little effect
on Peter’s mood. It might even make it worse.
“I’m not stupid Andy. I know when I’ve lost. I am going to give Peter
the chance to choose - not because I think he’s going to choose me. And
I don’t think I really want him to. His heart isn’t in it any more.”
Ellie looked at Andy, her enormous eyes tearless. She wasn’t going to
cry over this. She wasn’t sure it was worth the effort. “I’m just going
to let you and Peter get on with it. Tilting at windmills.”
Dalziel frowned at this, “You what?”Although he knew what she meant he
was going to let her explain. The lass always did like to proselytize -
the least he could do was give her that.
“You and him - Don Quixote and Sancho Panza. Fighting lost causes.”
“Aye, well it seems to me your marriage could be saved if you just gave
a little.” He expected her to retaliate to this, but he obviously
didn’t bait it right.
“I don’t think so Andy,” she sighed. “I know when to let go. He’s all
yours now.”
Dalziel raised his eyebrows. It was obviously pointless arguing with
her. She’d drawn her own conclusions and she was convinced she was
right.
“What exactly do you think me and Peter get up to on these cases Pet?”
Ellie gave him one of her trademark silent stares.
“Oh right. Like that is it?” He smirked. He wasn’t going to deny
anything. Let her think what she wanted to think if it made her happy.
*********************
So Peter had made his decision and now he was acting like a great
useless lump. Dalziel wanted to make it all better - but he didn’t want
any misunderstandings. One way or the other.
“You can’t keep sleeping on the couch - it’s unhygienic.” Dalziel could
cope with a lot, but the general muckiness of the house was getting to
him. It was starting to smell.
“I’m trying to find a place. There isn’t anywhere,” Peter insisted.
Dalziel knew this was rubbish, but he wasn’t going to start an
argument.
“Listen lad, if you are going to stay here maybe we should think about
more permanent arrangements, eh.”
“What?” Peter’ s eyes grew almost as large as his soon-to-be-ex-wife’s.
“Well there’s a spare room...”
Dalziel could have sworn that Peter looked almost disappointed for some
reason.
“Oh, I thought...nothing. Yeah spare room. I could do that,” the
younger man went back to his depressed state.
“Don’t sound so enthusiastic. No one’s forcing you to do anything. But
if you’re going to stay we need to sort things out. And you’re going to
have to start paying your share of the bills and stuff."
“Are you serious? You’d let me stay here?”
“Well it doesn’t look like I’ve got much hope of shifting you does it.
May as well get something out of the situation.”
Pascoe was beginning to cheer up a bit, Not much but it was a start.
“We’ll be like an old married couple before you know it!” He grinned.
“Oy Petal - watch it!” Dalziel warned with a smile.
Maybe Ellie was right. There was definite tension between them lately.
Whether it was of a sexual nature Dalziel couldn’t be sure. He sighed.
If anyone had told him...ah well he’d never let convention bother him
in the past. And after that business with the red widow it was obvious
that women weren’t always the pinnacles of virtue and saintliness he’d
always perceived them to be. What he had always looked for in a mate
was someone dependable. And despite his recent wavering, Peter Pascoe
was the most reliable person Dalziel knew.
Ellie had gone round the houses, using innuendo to try and get to the
truth. But if she thought Dalziel wasn’t going to latch on to what she
meant she was obviously not as clever as she thought she was. Had Peter
ever given her anything solid to base these ideas on?
It had been a few weeks, maybe the lad was up to talking about it by
now.
“Did Ellie ever say anything about me?” Not exactly what he wanted to
know, but he wasn’t averse to going round a few houses himself.
“Why did you have a secret yearning for her?” Peter grinned. Well it
was a good start - he didn’t get all jumpy when her name was mentioned.
“It’s just she seemed to think there was something going on between us.
Daft isn’t it?” Dalziel smiled, drawing a drag on his cigarette.
Pascoe looked up, “Ellie said that?”
“Well not in so many words - but it was definitely implied.”
“The bitch,” Pascoe jumped up, “I can’t believe that. She’s gone too
far this time.”
“Steady on lad. No need to get your knickers in a twist.”
“Well I must say you’re taking this remarkably calmly. I’d have thought
you’d be a little more upset by the allegation.”
“Why would I be upset. She’s entitled to her opinion, as off-beam as it
may be. Don’t flatter yourself son.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t know. Draw your own conclusions if you like.”
“Andy - you’re hardly Adonis. I think If I was looking for that kind of
relationship I could do a bit better.” Dalziel raised his eyebrow. This
was not coming out right, but Pascoe was not about to let it go. “You
do know Ellie used to call you the Fat Controller?”
Dalziel chuckled, “Oh aye? Funny girl that Ellie.”
“You’re enjoying this aren’t you. Watching me suffer.”
“Whatever gave you that idea? I just thought I’d let you know what she
said. Give you the full arsenal as it were.”
“Is that some sort of innuendo?”
“Wasn’t supposed to be. Unless you want it to be.”
“You talk to much.”
“’Ark who’s talking. You never shut up.”
“I resent that.” Pascoe had calmed down enough to sit - taking care not
to get too close to Dalziel.
“Was it something I said?” Dalziel said laconically. “Or don’t you
trust yourself now?”
“Andy!” Peter warned, but there wasn’t much behind it.
“Is the idea really so horrible then?”
Pascoe wasn’t sure he’d heard right. It was all right joking about, but
that last bit sounded almost serious. Actually the idea wasn’t horrible
at all, but if Dalziel ever found out he’d never live it down. Still he
didn’t want to hurt his feeling either way.
“You are taking this a bit far aren’t you,” Pascoe was sure his partner
would take this as his cue to leave it.
“Ah - but am I taking it far enough?”
“You were supposed to say ‘ha ha, had you going’.”
“Ha ha, had you going,” Andy said dutifully.
“I’m only going to ask once - and if I’m reading this wrong I’ll move
out first thing in the morning,” Peter paused, Andy nodded for him to
continue. “Is there something going on between us?”
Andy looked amused and bemused simultaneously. “I would think that’s
something you would know.”
“Yes but I need to hear it from you.”
“Well what do you think?”
“I asked you.”
“Well if you have to ask then obviously there must be something in it.”
“Ah.” Peter cupped his hands and rubbed his face. “Yeah - I thought so
too.”
“Always best to check.”
“Do you want to pursue it?”
Andy smiled in answer.
“This is a bit awkward isn’t it?” Peter said.
“You could say that.”
“Us living together and working together and...”
“Sleeping together?
“Yes.”
“It is a bit.”
The conversation had dried up. Peter looked at Andy and smiled
sheepishly.
“I suppose it was inevitable really,” he said.
“Are you going to kiss me or am I going to have to force myself upon
you?”
Both men were breathing heavily. The tension was definitely sexual now.
They looked at each other. Funny how as the years went by he was
increasingly beginning to resemble Dalziel, Pascoe thought. Like a dog
looking like its master. Or the other way round.
Funny too - that face, so near to his own now, was bringing on the sort
of feelings that had long since disappeared between him and Ellie.
Maybe he was just attracted to odd looking people. There was a definite
beauty in the strange...the thought was interrupted by Dalziel’s hand
on the back of his neck. Pascoe’s face was pulled forward. The slight
resistance was overcome very easily.
Dalziel’s hot mouth closed over Pascoe’s dry one. He had a sweet-salty
taste, slightly metallic with a touch of tobacco. It was strangely
addictive. The younger man closed his eyes as the Dalziel’s rough
tongue explored.
Pascoe pulled away breathlessly, opening his eyes, and placing his hand
on his partner’s chest.
Dalziel looked at him, slightly confused. “What’s the matter? Want to
back out?”
“No. I don’t. I just wanted to look at you properly.” He reached
out and touched Andy’s lips gently, smiling sleepily.
Dalziel took Pascoe’s wrist and begun to suck on his fingers.
“Oh god, Andy.” He placed his other hand on the older detectives
crotch. Dalziel let go of the fingers.
“Are you sure?” He asked tentatively.
“Quite sure,” Pascoe smiled and kissed him, his hand was where it
needed to be. He was where he needed to be.